


The Girl With the Weight of the World in Her Hands

by Cinaed



Category: Stargate Atlantis
Genre: First Kiss, Friends to Lovers, M/M, Rule 63
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-01-17
Updated: 2009-01-17
Packaged: 2017-10-08 03:32:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,344
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/72256
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cinaed/pseuds/Cinaed
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Doctor McKay's reputation preceded her.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Girl With the Weight of the World in Her Hands

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks go out to blue_raven for looking this over for me. I added in another scene, so any mistakes are mine. The show_goes_on prompt was 'girl!McKay/Zelenka, hot geek sex.'

_"Is the glass half-full or empty?" I ask her as I fill it.  
She said it doesn't really matter, pretty soon you're bound to spill it._  
\- “The Girl With the Weight of the World In Her Hands” by Indigo Girls

Doctor McKay’s reputation preceded her. Long before they were formally introduced, Radek had been warned about the abrasive chief scientist and forced to listen to numerous tirades from Grodin and Kusanagi about the latest insult McKay had inflicted upon them.

Radek had taken each complaint with a grain of salt-- that is, until he finally met McKay, and then he wondered what else his fellow scientists had forgotten to include in their tales.

He kept his expression bland and his voice matter-of-fact, because if what he’d heard about the infamous Meredith McKay was anything to go by, arguing with her would simply make matters worse and drag the interaction on longer. “It’s Zelenka. Not Zuluva.”

McKay waved a hand, obviously dismissing his words, and Radek gritted his teeth. “Right, right. As I was saying, Grodin mentioned you’ve been relatively helpful when it comes to using the Ancient tech we’ve found on the outpost so far. Grodin requested it, and you’ll be working with his team from now on.”

Radek blinked. _Relatively_ helpful? Peter had told him just yesterday that he’d prevented one of the other scientists from blowing up the control chair! “Thank you for the amazing opportunity, Doctor McKay,” was all he said. Luckily McKay didn’t notice the sarcasm that colored his words or how forced his smile was.

McKay turned on heel and marched away, and Radek contented himself with glaring at her back. Relatively helpful. Well, Radek would show her how much one could accomplish while being _relatively_ helpful.

**  
**

The next time he saw McKay face-to-face, it was two days before they would step through the gate and set foot on Atlantis. He was jet-lagged and bone-achingly tired from saying good-bye to his sister and fending off Jana’s numerous questions about where he was going.

Judging by the pallor of McKay’s skin and the shadows under her eyes, McKay hadn’t fared very well with her good-byes either, and despite himself, Radek offered her a smile of sympathetic camaraderie.

McKay looked startled, glancing over her shoulder as though suspecting Radek of smiling at someone just past her, and then smiled hesitantly back. Her mouth was slightly lopsided, Radek noticed, and her eyes were very blue. Radek blinked. He must be more exhausted than he thought if he was noticing these things about _Meredith McKay_, of all people.

He shook his head to clear it, and then said, “Come, I have some Březňák in my quarters.” When McKay’s expression shifted to one of incomprehension, he added cheerfully, “Beer? You look as though you need some.”

“You smuggled _beer_ onto the outpost?” McKay asked, looking as though she couldn’t decide between being scandalized and impressed, and Radek laughed.

“Of course. I had to have _something_ to keep me warm in this weather.” McKay continued to stare at him, and Radek raised an eyebrow. “So, would you like some?”

“I, uh, I’d like--” McKay began, and then grimaced a little at Doctor Weir’s call of, “Meredith! Could I speak with you for a moment?”

“Later, perhaps,” Radek said, and McKay nodded and headed down the hall towards Doctor Weir. Radek watched her go, knowing the invitation would be forgotten. Ah well. He supposed that just meant more Březňák for him.

**  
**

It took McKay almost three months to finally get Radek's name right. (Almost, because there was still disagreement on how many hours there were per day, an argument that didn't seem to be ending any time soon.) Kavanagh won the betting pool-- he'd guessed that McKay would actually get 'Zelenka' right after two months and three weeks.

After that, though, Radek almost wished McKay hadn't figured out his name, because now she seemed to yell for him every time she needed 'the opinion of someone who wasn't too much of an idiot,' which apparently excluded everyone else in the science division. Radek adjusted his sleep schedule (or lack thereof), accordingly. Besides, he couldn't help but feel a certain smugness that his 'relative helpfulness' had become so vital to many of McKay's experiments and had allowed him to become the unofficial expert on the puddlejumpers and second foremost expert on Ancient tech. 

Besides, as long as he ignored the fact that McKay was abrasive, annoying, and had the social skills of a rabid dog, Radek could enjoy spending time with her. She was undeniably brilliant, and Radek had finally found someone for whom he didn't have to slow down his thoughts. It was rather ironic, he supposed, that he would have to come on a one-way trip to another galaxy to find his intellectual equal (even if McKay would have scoffed at this and declared Radek her intellectual inferior, just a shade or two higher than the rest of the idiots here who called themselves 'scientists').

**  
**

"No," Radek said. "Definitely not, Meredith."

Meredith scowled at him, but after over a year of such glares, Radek had grown used to them and didn't cower. He simply folded his arms against his chest and stared back. "Come on, Radek. Don't be unreasonable about this."

"I am not being unreasonable, Meredith. You are, for asking this of me."

Meredith rolled her eyes. "You've gone off-world before. I realize you hate it, but I really don't think I'm asking too much of you--"

"McKay, you are asking me to pose as your husband so that you can look at some planet's possible Ancient tech. That is the definition of unreasonable. Now, go ask Colonel Sheppard or one of the Marines to pose as your husband, please. I need to finish the repairs on Jumper Six." All right, so Kavanagh and Simpson could handle the final touches on the jumper-- Radek wasn't about to let that little fact ruin his chance to avoid this debacle. And a debacle it was-- Meredith and Teyla having to pretend to be married to someone, because M5H-344's society believed that unmarried women could not leave the home and married women must be accompanied everywhere by their husbands.

Meredith huffed out a breath and shook her head. "I'm not asking Sheppard, because I don't think he would be able to stop laughing the entire mission, and Teyla already nabbed Ronon, so come on, just say yes." She tilted her head and offered him an almost pathetic look. Radek knew it was a trick, but he couldn't help but sigh as Meredith added, "You know you want to have a look at M5H-344's technology. Even if the planet happens to be controlled by a group of male chauvinistic pigs who deserve a feminist uprising." She scowled and muttered under her breath about backwards civilizations and stupid societal constraints.

Why did he bother arguing with Meredith, when he knew she was going to win 98.9% of the time? He shook his head. "Yes, I do, in the safety of my own lab," he muttered. "Besides, perhaps you don't, but _I_ prefer to have at least a date or two before marriage."

Meredith rolled her eyes. "Hilarious. Come on, just do this for me." When Radek just looked at her, she huffed. "_Fine_. I promise that I'll share the credit if it turns out they do have a ZPM."

"How generous of you," Radek replied, but his dry tone was half-hearted at best, and Meredith's expression shifted to one of victory. "Very well. I'll go."

"Thanks, Radek. We're leaving tomorrow at eleven. Teyla will send over the appropriate clothes."

"All right," Radek said. Then, "Wait, what is this about appropriate clothes? You did not mention we have to wear costumes, Meredith! Meredith!" He glared at her back as she walked away, ignoring his questions. "If this involves feathered hats or something equally ridiculous, I will get revenge!" Meredith didn't even falter, and Radek sighed.

**  
**

Luckily, the costume he had to wear wasn't too bad-- it looked like traditional Athosian clothing, with a blue circle stitched into the front of the chest to show that he and Meredith were married. And Radek contented himself with the fact that Meredith was fidgeting in her own dress, fiddling with the sleeves, rearranging her flak vest, and grumbling to herself about ridiculous native customs and her hatred of pantyhose. Radek tried not to stare, even though this was only the second time he'd seen her in a dress-- the last time had been during the celebration right after their arrival in the Pegasus galaxy. She hadn't looked uncomfortable then, but she certainly did now.

She noticed his gaze, and frowned. "What are you looking at?" she demanded, and scowled harder at Radek's silent shrug.

Sheppard grinned, laughter in his voice as he said, "Okay, kids, lets get this show on the road before McKay has a stroke."

"I am not--" Meredith began to protest indignantly, and then gave up as Sheppard strolled through the 'gate. Muttering very un-ladylike things under her breath, Meredith followed.

"Thank you for accompanying us, Doctor Zelenka," Teyla said, once they had stepped through to M5H-344. It was a bleak, melancholy day, with only a few sunbeams sneaking through the clouds. It certainly reflected Meredith's mood. Teyla offered him a warm smile. "I know you dislike going off-world."

Radek smiled back, uncertain of what to say, and in the end simply shrugged and said, "Meredith can be very persuasive."

Ronon snorted. "You mean she just kept talking at you until you agreed." 

"Yes," Radek agreed, smiling a little. "I think it is the method Meredith often uses to win her arguments."

"Hurry up!" Meredith shouted at them, and Ronon rolled his eyes, a half-fond, half-annoyed look on his face. It was an expression people often wore around Meredith.

Radek tried not to think about how often he wore that expression himself.

**  
**

"So," Sheppard said a few hours later, hovering in the doorway of the planet's equivalent of a laboratory and looking vaguely uncomfortable. "It looks like we're going to have to spend the night." One of the natives stood just behind Sheppard, his expression apologetic and flustered.

Meredith and Radek both stared at him, and then as one, glanced out the window. They had been so engrossed in examining the Ancient tech (not a ZPM, but some sort of low-level power generator that could be extremely useful on Atlantis) that they hadn't noticed when the heavens had opened and the rain had begun to pour. Squinting, Radek could tell that there was already some flooding. No doubt there was flooding in the valley containing the planet's Stargate. Wonderful. 

"All right, so we're stuck here tonight," Meredith said with a careless shrug. From her tales, Radek knew it was an often enough occurrence. Then he watched in surprise as her face paled a little. It was only when she touched the blue stitching on her dress that Radek realized why she looked so horrified. Though really, she didn't have to look_distraught_. Radek already had visions of sleeping on the floor while Meredith hoarded the bed.

"Let me guess, everyone's rooms are being prepared," Radek said, deadpan, as Meredith continued to be speechless with horror. 

"Yeah," Sheppard said, his earlier discomfort replaced by amusement at Meredith's reaction. "Though we're getting a meal in our honor, apparently."

Meredith opened her mouth, but nothing came out. At last, she shook her head and turned that bright blue gaze upon Radek. "I get the bed," she informed him, soft so that only Radek could hear her words, and Radek sighed. 

"Of course you do," he said wearily, and mentally apologized to his spine. It was going to be an uncomfortable night. 

**  
**

The meal was quite good, truth be told. The food was similar to a Mediterranean style, with lots of fruit, vegetables, and bread, and far more variety than could be found on the mainland. Teyla and Ronon seemed to be enjoying the charade immensely, Ronon grinning and offering her slices of fruit. Radek fought back an amused smile at the envious looks directed toward Ronon. He couldn't blame them, really.

"So, how did your wife come to learn so much of the Ancestors and their gifts?" someone asked him, and he looked away from Ronon and Teyla, blinking. It was one of the priests who had watched Radek and Meredith examine the generator, the more pinch-faced, irritable one, who had constantly shot Meredith incredulous looks when she had said something biting and sarcastic at Radek.

"Our people believe women have rights," Meredith snapped, before Radek could answer.

He mentally sighed at the dark look on the priest's face. While he understood Meredith's frustration, antagonizing the priest wouldn't do any good. "What Meredith means is that we believe everyone has the right to learn about the Ancestors," he said, and, despite his better judgment, placed his hand over Meredith's, shielding her whitenened knuckles from view.

She shot him a startled look, hand twitching under his, and then huffed out a breath. "Yes, everyone should be able to worship the Ancestors," she said, without much enthusiasm, and spent the rest of the meal frowning but silent as the priest spoke to Radek and acted as though Meredith were invisible.

**  
**

Although he knew Meredith would never agree to share, Radek couldn't help looking wistfully at the bed when they entered the room. It was large and comfortable-looking. In fact, it was a bed fit for royalty, with plump, inviting pillows and what felt like silk sheets when he ran a hand over the bed's surface.

"No," Meredith said, when she noticed Radek's gaze. Her face was flushed, her mouth set at a mulish angle as she and Radek both deposited their bags at the foot of the bed. "You get the floor."

Radek scowled. "I am hardly going to throw myself upon you in the night, McKay," he said, grabbing a pillow and one of the blankets after he'd shrugged out of his jacket and flak vest. "Besides, the bed is large enough to share."

"Maybe," Meredith acknowledged. "But you look like a blanket-hogger. I don't want to wake up in the middle of the night, freezing, become somebody stole all the blankets."

Radek rolled his eyes. "If anyone is a blanket-stealer, it would be you, Meredith." Then, ignoring Meredith's yelp of dismay, he put the blanket and pillow back onto the bed and sat down, bending down to untie his boots. If she was so determined to have the bed to herself, she could shove him off during the night. "Actually, I suspect you kick people in your sleep. And snore."

"I do not snore!" Meredith shouted. Radek could feel her gaze boring into his back. "And I don't kick, either. Or talk. Also, you are not sleeping in bed with me."

Radek ignored her, humming a traditional Czech lullaby under his breath as he eased himself out of his boots and socks. 

"Fine," Meredith said after a long pause, sounding sulky. "But I get the right side of the bed. It's better for my back."

Radek snorted, but didn't bother arguing. He didn't mind sleeping on the left side, so long as he actually got to sleep on the bed. "Seven hundred and twenty seven," he said over his shoulder, shoving his boots and socks under the bed.

"What? Oh, prime. One thousand seven hundred and seventy-eight."

"Not prime. Nine hundred and two." By the time Radek turned back toward Meredith, she too had shed her shoes and was already in bed, blanket pulled up to her neck and a thoughtful rather than annoyed frown on her face.

"Not prime. Nine hundred and eleven," she said, and Radek climbed into bed as he answered her, being careful to avoid bumping against her. Luckily, it was easy to do, with this bed that could fit three or four people. Radek knew he would miss this bed when he had to return to his pitiful excuse for a cot on Atlantis.

They stayed on their own sides of the bed, with Radek stretched out on his side and facing away from her. They kept up the game of prime/not prime, Radek closing his eyes and letting everything drift away except for the sound of Meredith's voice and the mathematical calculations going on in the back of his mind. He supposed most people would find this game boring rather than relaxing, but he and Meredith had never been 'most people.'

He was half-asleep when Meredith paused for a moment in answering 7919, and then he heard her voice, soft so that he half-opened his eyes and strained to hear her answer. "Prime. Sixty-nine." Radek went to answer, and then the symbolic nature of that particular number caught up to his sleep-muddled mind, and nothing came out of his mouth.

"Sixty-nine," Meredith repeated, an odd note in her voice this time, and when Radek opened his eyes all the way and turned to face her, he couldn't make out her expression, the dim moonlight and shadows obscuring her features. He knew her features, though, had practically memorized them during their time on Atlantis. He knew that Meredith McKay was not a particularly beautiful woman. Handsome, perhaps, with strong bones in her face and arresting blue eyes, but not beautiful. She kept her hair short, almost in a military style. If Radek had wanted to, he could have reached out and brushed his hand along the short locks framing Meredith's face. 

His fingers twitched, and he licked his lips, throat suddenly dry and mind utterly blank. Surely Meredith had just chosen that number at random. Surely she did not feel that way about him. Oh, he had imagined what it would be like, but this was Meredith McKay he'd been fantasizing about, a woman who would no doubt take pleasure in kicking his ass if he'd expressed his feelings and she didn't return them.

"Sixty-nine," Meredith said again, and this time he could decipher the note in her voice-- anxiety. Well then. Perhaps not so random after all.

Radek licked his lips again. The answer, when it came, was low and a little hoarse. "Prime."

There was a pause, as Radek slowly realized his mistake (23 x 3 = 69, therefore not prime, therefore Meredith had driven Radek's intellect away and left only his hind brain intact), and then Meredith said, "Well?" with a trace of impatience now, and when Radek went to answer her, not in words but in numbers, because his mind was still struggling to recall language after this stunning proposition, she interrupted him with an urgent kiss, mouth warm and eager against his. She'd drawn closer to him during their game, he realized as she pressed her body against his. 

A soft sound of want escaped his lips when she finally broke off the kiss, his entire body aching with need as her warm body stayed flushed against his. Meredith laughed in response, a bright, happy sound. "You are the biggest idiot in the Pegasus galaxy," she announced, but the harsh words had the tone of an endearment. "Three months now, and you don't get that I've been seducing you." 

Radek blinked at her, not quite able to make sense of that. "Then why did you not want to share the bed?" he asked at last, resisting for the moment the urge to kiss her wonderful, sideways smirk, kiss that pleased, smug expression off her face until only lust darkened her eyes.

Meredith snorted. "Please, I might want you, but I'm not _easy_." Before Radek could assure her that she was anything but easy or burst out laughing at the very idea, Meredith pressed herself closer, and Radek's breath escaped him in one single exhale. Well then. He gave into his earlier temptation, pressing kisses to her mouth, her jaw, her throat, until she was quiet, save for eager sighs and soft sounds of pleasure.

Thank God for M5H-344.


End file.
